“And just like that… they’re gone.”
Empty Nesting- What no one tells you
If you have a high school senior who’s preparing to leave for college, you most likely feel a mixture of emotions. It is exhilarating and full of frenzy, no doubt. But no one prepares you for the overwhelming sadness that creeps in. After experiencing my own grief while empty nesting, I have found 4 ways to ease the sadness. If you are deep in the empty nesting season and struggling with mom grief, these four strategies will help you not only survive but start to thrive again!
The 4 Ways to Overcome the Sadness:
“A mother’s job is to teach her children not to need her anymore. The hardest part of that job is accepting success.”
– unknown
#1 Find Your NEW Purpose
As you look around your empty house, you are probably thinking ‘what now?’ Sweet momma, I see you. I feel you. That was the hardest part for me to overcome as a new empty nester- what do I do now? YOU FIND YOUR NEW PURPOSE, that’s what you do! This is a time to get your creative juices flowing and think back to what hobbies you enjoy. Make a list of hobbies you want to get back into or try for the first time! You will have a lot more free time now and it’s better to be productive and busy than staying home crying. Volunteer! This is also a great way to add purpose to your life. Whether you help out at your church, a local soup kitchen, or sew blankets for the NICU, you will be amazed at how blessed your life will become!
#2 Lean In
When your soul hurts, when your heart hurts, give yourself the grace you deserve. As moms we often stuff our emotions down in order to be the ‘strong’ one, the one that has it all together, the one that is handling life just fine. But it’s okay to feel your emotions, like actually FEEL them. In fact, that’s exactly what you need to do in order to move through this sadness. Lean in and hold space for these emotions. It’s ok to cry, it’s ok to be sad, it’s ok to feel empty. The biggest thing that helped me lean in and feel my emotions was to journal daily. There is something powerful about getting all the emotions and thoughts from your mind out onto paper. It frees up space in your mind for more positive thoughts. So grab your journal and start this practice today!
#3 Add In Self-Care
When was the last time you enjoyed a massage, took a yoga class or had fresh highlights done? What makes you feel good in your own skin? What makes your soul happy? Self-Care is so important, not only on the outside but the inside too. A major turning point for me was discovering the magic of meditation. I wish I had known its benefits years ago! Find a meditation class to join or find a guided meditation on YouTube. Start with 5 minutes each day and slowly work your way up to 20 minutes. The amount of peace and happiness that you will start to experience will be mind blowing. You won’t be disappointed!
#4 Find Your Tribe
You are not alone! This is a new season of your life and it can feel overwhelming. You need to reach out to others, reconnect with friends, join an empty nesters Meetup group, or connect with others on social media. Start hosting weekly dinners at your house, start walking with your neighbor in the mornings, set a weekly coffee date with a friend. Having your tribe surround you during this emotional time will provide an abundance of healing.
That’s it for now, my fellow empty nesters. We can do this! Use these four strategies in your life in order to overcome the sadness of an empty nest. Start with just one item from the list above. Oftentimes, making one simple change is all it takes to propel us forward.
Wishing you much joy and happiness during this season.
“You’re Going to Miss This Someday”
– Mom